Unfortunately life never seems to pull a U-ie and imitate art. I want it to more then most people probably realize. I want that awesome best friend who can talk at a moments text or rushes over with a pint of Ben and Jerry's when you are down. I feel like I will never found him/her, I feel as if I am that person to everyone else but no one can return the favor. It just feels like no real life flesh and blood person is there to catch me when I fall in the movie that is my life.
I guess no one showed up for the casting call so that perfect best friend just unfortunately got written out of the pilot script.
Is it sad to say I envy all the people I have done so much for. I envy them because none of the love and care I give to them ever seems to be returned.
I can't let go of the one guy I love even though I probably should because in his mind he can never love me back, and it breaks my heart over and over again but yet it still beats it has realized that it has to go one it has to continue rebuilding itself because it has to love and break at the same time because I won't let it do anything else but that.
I love with a broken heart every day. I am constantly in between anger and contentness, sadness and happiness. Is it fair? Probably not but, when is life ever fair to anyone?
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